I’m taking back my power as far as what I can accomplish. It’s taken me a really long time to get here, but I’m here now and ready to keep my eye on the prize. My prize is my physical health. With that comes every other aspect of my life.
I’ve picked lots of significant days to stop smoking before. I’ve now made the commitment to take by my power with my health. I’m picking my day to honor my children’s birthday’s. In my case, I want to be able to visualize having the health and wellness that I want. I want to be able to reclaim my health so I can understand how I feel in my own skin.
In there here and now, I want to have success.I want to focus on what’s going on right now. Things won’t always go as planned, but that is life.I’ve made a commitment to the day, but I’ve also made a commitment to myself. Come along with my journey!
As you know, I’m on a journey of self-reflection and discovering where I am going on my business journey. I’ve come to realize at my age, is that I’ve spent a lot of my life being in conflict with what I really wanted to do vs. what others wanted me to do. I’m now beginning to embrace being a rebel, and I don’t mind it at all.
I’ve been doing my research on Deb time, and I’ve broken it down into 3 parts.
In the last episode, I told you about my new journey of reflection that I was embarking on based on the Thyroid Adrenal Revolution Book by Dr. Aviva Rom.. Today, I want to share with you the catalyst for my journey.
I wanted to go inward to get my physical health where it needs to be. I have suffered with a lack of energy, and I’m still in prep mode for this journey.
I have a beach house that I rent out all summer. I was staying there for a bit, and a few days into my trip, I noticed I started getting really itchy. I wasn’t sure if I was dealing with sand fleas or something else. The rash kept getting worse and I went to a party with some friends and started talking with some friends about it. Needless to say, we realized I was dealing with bed bugs.
I chose to get a heat treatment on the house, rather than treat it with chemicals. After this situation, I went into a funk and got depressed. Felt really violated.It’s taken close to a month to get over my symptoms. I was stressed out so much that I ended up breaking out in hives.
I took some benadryl when I got home and slept for 15 hours. This was the catalyst that told me it was time to take charge of my body and my health. I believe that if you can figure out your physical wellness, you can also figure out your financial wellness.
I’ve ridden the financial roller coaster in the last several years. The one remnant I salvaged was my beach house. I hit rock bottom and I want you to learn from my mistakes so you don’t have to go there.
Tomorrow we’re talking about the research needed to get ready to make the changes you need to make.
I’m in the process of figuring out my business and how I want to support myself, which is a big part of financial karma.
The path I’m currently following is based on The Thyroid Adrenal Revolution by Dr. Aviva Rom. I’ll be sharing more about that in future episodes.
The most important step to any change is actually being willing. Someone told me to be a leader, not a savior, and sometimes I tend to want to be a savior.
Tomorrow, I am going to share the catalyst for the change I am talking about - Bed Bugs! Ugh!
This episode wraps up my daily FB Live challenge. I forced myself to do this during my busiest time of the year (tax season)! I'm glad I made it. I've learned some lessons from doing this exercise. I've learned things about myself as well.
One way or another we all take from others - from our families, from the government or others that we aren’t even aware of. So now we are in a place where there’s a lot of finger pointing that goes on, and it’s created an environment where people are at odds with each other. Blaming others and pointing fingers at those that we perceive to be taking from the system isn’t helpful. Actually, it makes us a hypocrite because in many ways, we are also getting welfare.
In truth, we all should be taking and giving in our society. We all need each other and no one is truly self-sufficient. This giving and taking is what makes us part of a community and makes us feel like part of the tribe. No everyone living in poverty is taking welfare. Many are struggling to be self-sufficient and living at a very low standard. People that are struggling don’t need the stigma of “taking welfare” to traumatize them because it is counterproductive to everything they are attempting to do.
Since the Industrial Revolution in this country, we have been creating problems that we now need to solve. Problems like climate change, population shifts, work force changes, and many more. It takes an entire society to try and solve these problems, but we all have to work together. Open your mind to a different approach to things and see where that gets you. it will improve your growth mindset and how you view the world.
Today I wanted to talk to you about the war within yourself, vs. the diplomatic solution of solving your problems. It’s the war within our own bodies.
I quit smoking last year and I have gained some unwanted weight. I need to be kind to myself while I try to figure out what the solution for my body is. I can’t go to war with myself and go on a drastic diet and hit the gym 8 hours a day.
Our bodies need a lot of things. We need sensuality and play as a regular part of our lives. Having diplomacy allows you to be minimally at odds with yourself internally. It allows you to work through issues with flow and ease.Maybe you don’t have to go grind it out at the gym, but rather you join a dance class. Be kind and use diplomacy with yourself - don’t wage a war against yourself!
I’m in New York in the middle of tax season. I’m here for an event that I don’t really have time for, but I knew I would benefit from coming. So even though I don’t have time for it, and even though I am in the middle of tax season, I knew I had to come anyway. I could plan for it to have minimal impact, so I though “how can I not go?”. What are you saying "no" to that you would be better off taking advantage of!
Do you know what your gifts are? Are you leveraging them effectively? Today we are talking about gifts, and when I say gifts, I mean the things that you feel like you have a natural knack for and you excel at.
Using your gifts gives you an opportunity to show up for yourself. This is a growth mindset and it allows you to fully step into your power.
Many times your gifts may marry to opposing qualities. Then they become complementary skills.
The world needs you to show up with your skills! Collectively, there are opportunities that you can take advantage of by showing up!
Have you ever questioned yourself? Do you think you should do something just because you can? That’s what we’re talking about today. There are many things we are allowed to do because they are not illegal, but does that mean it’s ok to do it?
We do so many things because we can get away with it. But that doesn’t mean that it’s what is best for us. I went through one of these tough times when I was going through a divorce. I was in a bind with circumstances, but I also had a moral obligation. I probably could have declared bankruptcy legally, but would it have been the right thing for me to do. I needed to think about the long game and not make decisions only to get out of a jam. Just because you can make certain decisions, also think about the long term consequences. We can learn valuable lessons when bad things happen and we make good choices around it.
Many times we do things that do not align with our greater purpose. Sometimes we are closed off to the things that would make our lives what we really want them to be. In fact, our best lives are getting sacrificed on the altar of our current lives.
I’m a people pleaser, so this one has been a really hard thing for me. I get trapped in my daily life and it robs me of the future I desire. Many times we just need better boundaries to hold our dreams in a sacred space and not let anything interfere with it. It’s almost like we need selective hearing, so we can turn off the noise and only focus on what contributes to the life we really want.
Sometimes I am stubborn and I have to hit rock bottom before I take the steps to hold my dreams in the highest regard. Friends and likeminded community can help keep us on track. Sometimes we can be misguided and let this behavior overtake our lives.
It takes courage to hit rock bottom and get back on the horse every day. Being brave instead of being misguided means you accept the fact that this journey may be messy and bumpy sometimes. It’s brave to be honest with yourself in your current state. It makes you grow up!
See your life as it really is and you can improve your situation faster than you ever imagined. When you reframe misguided to brave, it will make a difference in your life.
I don’t want to be so serious all the time. I had to practice laughter in order to make fun of myself and my own foibles. The best way to laugh is with friends, but you can also laugh when you are alone. I want you to begin using your money to trade it for a pleasing experience - whether it’s time with friends or some other amazing experience, rather than buying things. Use laughter as the best medicine for anything that ails you!
It’s important for us to continue to work on the dreams that we have in our lives. Sometimes it takes awhile to get there and it seems like this particular journey has taken me awhile. I heard something yesterday that made me appreciate exactly where I am. Angela Duckworth wrote the book about GRIT and she decided to pursue the MacArthur grant for $100 million dollars. They came up with an audacious idea and it’s 3 parts - health, education, and saving! What a combination to put together, but the reason they did is because they put forth the idea that these 3 areas need major change in our society in order to have a lasting impact.
Savings are important for your well being and life experience. I am so glad this was reinforced by these very smart ladies! Can you imagine if they were able to get $100 million in order to do this work in our world? They didn’t get the grant, but that’s not stopping them from doing the work anyway!
The more you save, the more self-sufficient you can be throughout the rest of your life. But also, it changes your relationship with money when you have savings. My goal is to share the message of financial literacy to as many people as possible.
My book group reads books that help us in our lives. Even though I am an accountant, I am also a creative person. We are currently reading a book about money and it’s about being creative with our money.
Too often we get boxed in with thoughts and plans and almost become paralyzed and unable to move forward and do all the things in life that we want to.
I am a believer in having faith that good things will happen to you. But I am not one to sit back and say “Oh well, God will provide” and you don’t have to worry about things. I would rather think of it as God supports me in my endeavors to provide for myself and take care of myself.
We all have temporary scarcities in our lives, but the important thing is what we do after that temporary scarcity.
There are 3 things that I’m sharing about play today. It’s hard to justify it as an adult and it seems like we just don’t stop working to play very often. This is one area where we have to re-frame our thinking to make a change in how we prioritize play and make it a regular part of our lives.
I don’t know how many of you listen to the Story Corp podcast on NPR, but I just found out that they now had an app. So, I uploaded it and went to visit my parents. They are aging and they can’t do quite as much as they used to. So this app presented a great opportunity for me to document some of the stories of their lives in their own voices. So the thing that is different about this app compared to other voice recording apps is that it will save your audio recording in the Library of Congress. So, it’s a great way to preserve the stories, that will forever be a part of the Library of Congress.
Join me tomorrow as I am re-thinking my family relationships!
Risk and failure are ingredients in having a more balanced approach to living. If we are living in reality, risk and failure will be a steady visitor in your life!
I was vaccinated with a Victrola needle! I’ve always been very verbal and very chatty! I’ve gone through my entire life having a sense that I was never being listened to. I wasn’t feeling validated. It took me a long time to realize that this feeling was coming from me internally, and not from other people. When you grow up this way, you end up presenting yourself in a way that basically says “I’m not worth listening to.” The most important lesson you can learn is that there is work for you to do on yourself to step into a place where you can be heard and validated.
I was not a good listener at a point in my life. I wanted to show up as my best self, but I couldn’t because I wasn’t a good listener. I still have times where I am not a good listener. Years ago when I decided to do the work I needed to on myself, I went to a 12 step program. I learned to listen because I had no choice.
4 Things to Remember About Listening:
Today we are talking about the Grit habit. I love Angela Duckworth’s test to see how gritty you are! You can score from 1-5, and see where you rank on the scale.
I’ve realized over time that grit is sort of a learned behavior. I am an example of that. I have had to step up my grit over the last several years because I wanted to be happy.
3 things come to mind to make you more gritty:
Self-care is important.
In this series of FB live posts, I’m sharing some things that are coming up with me on a day to day basis. I had an experience with my local CVS pharmacy that resembled bullying. I’ve learned from being bullied that it is not ok, and I also determine that I need to take my power back anytime this happens and I will not be a victim.
My advice is never to cry in front of men because we don’t want to be perceived as being weak. Many times we just need to feel heard, and when we are not being heard, our feelings get hurt.
Sometimes others have a different agenda than we do. You may not associate bullying with your finances. In a patriarchic society, that’s one of the main control mechanisms that is used against women.
Listen to this episode as we talk about how money can be used against us in a power play. This is bullying and it’s not ok.
In this day and age, I think we all use technology way more than we ever imagined. You don’t have to do everything and you don’t have to let the technology drive you crazy! Today I wanted to give you 6 apps and tools you can use to make your life easier. Tech overwhelm can become a thing of the past. It’s more important to work on yourself and then use technology to support the aspects of your life that you are improving!
For productivity - To-Doist
For social media - I only focus on FB and Twitter and I use Meet Edgar
For Record Keeping - Less Accounting - a creative recommended it to me!
For Creativity - Canva and Word Swag
For Concentration - Focus at Will
For Scheduling - eventually I will be moving to an app besides my Google Calendar